Can You Start a Sentence With Again
ane / ten
"To exist honest …"
Also lookout man out for: "To tell you the truth," "Honestly," and "Tin can I be honest?"
TBH is a cherry flag for your listeners because it makes them wonder: Are y'all just at present starting to tell the truth? Was everything you previously stated a large quondam lie? "When we add a preface, or we experience we demand to add something after we've fabricated a statement, information technology could appear as not credible," says Julie Blais Comeau, the primary etiquette officeholder at EtiquetteJulie.com. "Have ownership of what you're saying. Only country information technology, instead of calculation an introduction or an afterthought." Check out the origin of these commonly used phrases.
2 / x
"No criminal offence …"
Besides known equally: "Not to be mean, but" or even "This comes from a place of dear…"
The minute the person you're talking to hears these words, he's going to brace for an insult. "No criminal offence" pretty much equals "here comes an offensive comment." If you practice need to deliver a criticism or some feedback that might be hard to hear: First, do it in private. Then, frame it with an "I" statement, says Jephtha Tausig, PhD, a clinical psychologist in New York Urban center. "Try something like, 'I'yard concerned about this considering … ' and so explain why," she says. Some other gentle approach: "Would you lot be open to some feedback?" Brand sure you're enlightened of these compliments that are actually pretty insulting.
three / 10
"Well, actually …"
Just say no to this sentence-opener, which turns yous into a cavalier over-explainer in merely two words. Your listener hears: "I'm correct and you're wrong." "Information technology'southward more productive to say something like, 'From what I sympathize,' or 'From the data I have,'" says Dr. Tausig. "That leaves the door open for the other person to add together to what you lot say, or even concord with y'all." Also, avert the most annoying phrases in the English language linguistic communication.
four / 10
"This may sound stupid …"
Also avoid: "This may be a silly question" and "I may exist wrong here, but…"
In that location'south no "may" most it: Once you've introduced a negative quality, similar "stupid" or "incorrect," you can't take it back. Your listeners are already assuming that aye, y'all're not too bright. You also sound similar yous're lacking confidence, especially if you utilise a phrase similar this in a work setting. "Anybody else in the coming together will exist trying to end themselves from rolling their eyes," says Comeau. Go ahead and ask your question or brand your statement without an intro that undercuts yous and what yous're about to say. These words and phrases used to be insults—but are now compliments.
v / 10
"You lot should …"
This phrase (and its siblings "If I were you …" and "have you lot tried…") gives off a very condescending vibe. "You are maxim that yous know better," says Dr. Tausig. "It makes it seem like the other person is not entitled to her own perspective or emotions, that hers are less legitimate than yours." A amend approach is to simply heed without commenting. If you lot do accept some advice that yous think might be helpful, ask if it'due south OK to share information technology. If yous get permission, kickoff with a more understanding phrase, similar "you've probably already explored this" or "everyone is dissimilar, but something surprising that worked for me was … " Here are some words (and phrases) y'all're probably using all wrong.
6 / ten
"I'm not racist, but …"
That's a really big but. "It negates your previous clause," says Dr. Tausig, so what you're really saying is, "Hither comes a racist whopper." That's never a good way to showtime (or continue) a chat. If you're tempted to become this route, accept a jiff and call back twice about what you're nearly to say. Is information technology actually going to add to a discussion in a positive way? And watch out for these other phrases smart people never say.
seven / 10
"I recollect …"
Hold on! What'south wrong with sharing your opinion? Usually, nothing—but particularly at work, starting off a sentence this way tin can make you sound weak. It's very natural to brainstorm a statement with "I call back," says Julie Comeau, but "it's not very persuasive." Since you don't mean "I am not certain, only," in this case, Comeau recommends a preface such every bit "I believe," "I'm certain that," or "Based on my feel" instead. These trendy slang words need to terminate.
8 / 10
"I know but how you experience …"
This is one of the worst ways to beginning a sentence, especially if you are talking to someone who is grieving. You really don't know how the person feels, says Dr. Tausig, even if you've too lost a parent or a spouse or a pet. Information technology's just insensitive. "An open-ended arroyo is ordinarily better," says Dr. Tausig. "You might say, 'Would you lot like to talk?' then that they can reply with every bit much or as little as they wish to say." Provide back up by checking in after a little time has passed, when others have come and gone. Offering a specific invitation: "I'd love to assistance you lot winterize your garden," or "I'm going to a concert adjacent Friday. Would you similar to bring together me?" These are the phrases all women need to remove from their vocabulary.
9 / 10
"As I previously stated …"
Ouch. Hostile much? Use this ane, and you sound like y'all're passive-aggressively calling someone out for not listening. Either that or you are trying to lay merits to an thought or a thought—just again, in an unnecessarily aggressive fashion. You lot certainly deserve credit for your good suggestions. And you deserve to have a respectful audience that's paying attention. But if you don't, a frosty opening similar this ane probably won't help. Even swapping "we" for "I" can help here. Y'all need to stop using these surprisingly offensive words.
10 / 10
"Just …"
As in "Just so you know" or "Yous could just … " or even "I just want to know … " Just say no! "These phrases are really invalidating," says Dr. Tausig. They communicate an mental attitude of "I'thousand about to drop a bomb that doesn't have your feelings into account." It's less confrontational to utilize a phrase such as "I would similar to know," suggests Julie Comeau. Skip the "merely"-ifying and become right to the point! Side by side, read nearly these words that you're probably using all wrong.
Sources:
- Julie Blais Comeau, the primary etiquette officer at EtiquetteJulie.com
- Jephtha Tausig, PhD, a clinical psychologist in New York City
Originally Published: February 19, 2020
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Source: https://www.rd.com/list/phrases-you-shouldnt-use-to-start-sentences/
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